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The Life Thread

Started by BojackHorsefella, May 14, 2018, 07:04:48 PM

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Crewe

So this weekend, I accepted an opportunity and set out to grow my own tomatoes, peppers and herbs via a planter box and pot.
I have never tried anything like this, but Ill never forget the first time I tried truly fresh tomatoes and it was amazing. So Im hoping I succeed!

BojackHorsefella

That's so neat!

I'm so impatient with any project I undergo, I always want something I can finish in an hour so I can relax or move onto whatever's next, without feeling I have something unfinished I "should" be doing. Learning to make my own pace. So I started whittling while in quarantine (actually have had the knives since xmas, but finally got some basswood to start on. I'm told it's softer and a bit easier for beginners).

Anyways, did that for about an hour the other day, got an owl started, so we'll see how that goes at some point in the future, presumably.

Crewe

Thats awesome. I picked up whittling when I was a kid at my uncles ranch. Didnt get real good at it but it was fun.
we will see if I have any semblance of a green thumb or not lol

TheNorm

That's pretty damn impressive fellas, and glad you're both keeping yourselves occupied! One of those things I miss about home is not being able to grow a garden. You're absolutely right Crewe, there's nothing quite like truly fresh tomatoes and peppers.

I've been travel nursing for about a year and a half now (the first 15 months in Chicago), and got to Peoria about a month ago. This city was boring before everything got locked down lol, but it has helped me figure out some things about myself and what matters to me.

First off, I'm honestly not sure how much longer I want to do this travel nurse thing. Technically a travel RN can go just about anywhere they've got needs, but honestly I loved where I landed off the bat and it was comforting to get to know a good group of people. Plus it was Chicago, so I was living it up. When it became clear that they finally weren't going to need me as a traveler anymore (the hospital was a ton of $$$ over budget and had to cut costs), I had to line up a new job. Luckily I found one in Peoria so I didn't need to go license hunting, but then you've got a couple days of orientation, a crap ton of modules that need to be done by a certain date, a new charting system, getting to know new people and a new city...I just kinda realized I'm not really about that life. On top of missing my family and dear friends back in Michigan and my new dear friends in Chicago, now I'm in a new city that I don't know at all and it's just jarring. Yeah, it's all mindset and making the most of it, but I realized I like my friends and people I can trust and trying to find new ones is a pain in the ass (add in a lockdown and it's near impossible...and also irresponsible to go out and about anyway). Granted, even if I was back in Michigan or Chicago right now I wouldn't be able to see or hang out with them anyway...but there's just something about being closer and not being out in the sticks (and yeah, Peoria's a city but it's basically just a small city surrounded by miles and miles of farmland).

So what have I been doing? Some videogames (finally beat RDR2 and played through MW Remastered, now going through MW2 remastered...yes that just dropped for PS4 a few days ago), but mostly a lot of music related stuff. Been messing with djay software and trying to get back up to speed on mixing again, took a couple of online dance lessons with my instructor/partner back in Michigan since everything's locked down there too (and why didn't we do this earlier? Might not be quite the same but we're familiar enough with each other we make it work). Also hosting online game night once a week with friends back in Michigan (again, why didn't we do this sooner) to see each other's faces and just have a good fun night without having to worry about all this. That's helped me quite a bit since I'm basically on an island. I live for those nights I can video call with them. And yes, also brushing up on COVID a bit since while I might be sheltered for now in the NICU I feel it's only a matter of time before this hits the littlest population too and I want to be ready...already read about a couple of cases where a mom that tested positive for it gave birth to their child and that child tested positive too. That's my nightmare.

Heh, guess I had a ton to say. Props to all of you that are surviving the best you can and getting by. Hope you can all weather this storm in some way, and honestly if there's even a little something I can do to help any of you just shoot me a message and I'll see what I can do. Stay home if you can, this virus isn't a joke. And wash your hands, it shouldn't take a pandemic to remind people of that lol. Cheers friends.
"But it is not enough for me to stand before you tonight and condemn riots. It would be morally irresponsible for me to do that without, at the same time, condemning the contingent, intolerable conditions that exist in our society. These conditions are the things that cause individuals to feel that they have no other alternative than to engage in violent rebellions to get attention. And I must say tonight that a riot is the language of the unheard. And what is it America has failed to hear? It has failed to hear that the plight of the negro poor has worsened over the last twelve or fifteen years. It has failed to hear that the promises of freedom and justice have not been met. And it has failed to hear that large segments of white society are more concerned about tranquility and the status quo than about justice and humanity." - Martin Luther King, Jr

Rigg44

Glad to see all you guys are making the best of the coivdocolipis. Norm I get what you are saying about the traveler gig.  I did it a long time ago and found that I am a guy that likes roots as well. hope you figure it all out. 

Being an RN, Surgical first assist, and hospital administrator there is no time for new skills or well anything other than COVID at this point.  To add to it my wife is disabled.  She was left with less than 30% lung capacity from an incident with H1N1 13 years ago.  So not only am I worried about my hospital and staff but also taking it home to my wife.

This to shall pass.  For some, it will be the worst thing that has ever happened, the loss of loved one, life long disability, for others it will be seen as much to do about nothing.  Both parties will claim the other should have done more and life will return to normal. Lets all just try and come out the other side of this with some perspective of what in life is actually important.   

Stay safe guys and WASH those hands.

Crewe

norm thats awesome to read, even thou I know its less fun for you now than it would normally be, but you are staying in contact, finding a little joy and most important, helping people.
I felt so small reading that as you've accomplished more by contributing than I ever have, and its truly appreciated.

rigg, Im really sorry to hear of your wife's issues, I cant imagine the strain and worry you must have with what's happening now.
Being out there in front of this thing takes balls, courage and will to help that most dont possess.
Stay safe guys!


TheNorm

So...have any of you had any interesting self-realizations or self-discoveries during this quarantine? Don't feel any pressure to be deep or positive either.
"But it is not enough for me to stand before you tonight and condemn riots. It would be morally irresponsible for me to do that without, at the same time, condemning the contingent, intolerable conditions that exist in our society. These conditions are the things that cause individuals to feel that they have no other alternative than to engage in violent rebellions to get attention. And I must say tonight that a riot is the language of the unheard. And what is it America has failed to hear? It has failed to hear that the plight of the negro poor has worsened over the last twelve or fifteen years. It has failed to hear that the promises of freedom and justice have not been met. And it has failed to hear that large segments of white society are more concerned about tranquility and the status quo than about justice and humanity." - Martin Luther King, Jr

Crewe

#157
Since you asked....
This will be quite the harangue, so...

I am self employed and since the Governor shut down the courts and all ancillary activity some time ago, rightfully so, I am out of work.
Attorneys still take depositions, but they just cannot get any rulings or be heard on any matter. However, those are all remote via Skype et al which means, no work for me since I have to actually be present.

The thrust of my daily issue is sleep.
Most nights, I toss and turn all night, sometimes I dont get to bed until 2 or 3 but it makes no difference. Some nights I am so tired, I cant sleep, if that resonates.
Ill get out of bed early morning and putter around but somewhere around 8-10am, I end up crashing out, but I dont want to sleep all day. Dont know why, doesn't matter, at all, but thats just me. So I struggle to wake up around noon or one and the day is just shot because Im exhausted and you know the mind isn't high functioning in that scenario.
Wash rinse repeat.
Now once in a while I'll throw in a shot of Nyquil to get some shut eye and things are ok for a day or two.
The sleep issue ties in to my potential for depression, especially under the current circumstances and I know it's anxiety keeping me awake because my realization is one that isn't new.
Im one step from the street, one foot on the curb actually.
I wasted my life, financially speaking. Never thought I'd live to retirement age so it didnt matter. And those days that wasn't the primary thought, it was usually, something will happen.
If it's not this pandemic, it could be a heart attack, a car wreck, an accident, anything, and Im pretty much toast.
There's no-one. Just me. Pretty frightening.
No money coming in at all.
Every Federal and state grant I've been able to find are defunded and I haven't been able to get through to the Texas unemployment office for obvious reasons and thats been a thing since early March.


Since I cannot afford to be sick, I stay away from people. My cousin stopped by 11 days ago for a few minutes, but didnt even get out of the car (distancing) and prior to that it was six days since I laid eyes on anyone.
It's tough, but I have to do it. No longer with an SO, which could be good or bad I guess, I do reach out to a few folks to talk to have some sort of contact which helps. I don't mind bing alone so much, but just the circumstances are becoming weary, as it is for everyone.

I try to focus on the day and not look too far ahead as that's disastrous, and, there's nothing I can do about it.
So I try to tackle the sleep thing to help my mind and when I am up and about, I force myself to attack my to do list, both fun and not fun, in order to get me physically exhausted to help me crash. To accomplish something, no matter how small because that helps motivation and outlook.
Under that umbrella, I've started trying to grow tomatoes, herbs and peppers; have taken on yoga, practice my guitar, take my dog out (who is a lifesaver) play a fuck ton of video games, cook quite a bit because I enjoy that too and last week I did a really deep dive on my house cleaning which was a major accomplishment.
Getting outside is a positive and just trying to focus on what I can control.
To that end, I did have a good ay yesterday.
What seems like many moons ago, I was able to find a number to the unemployment office that allowed you to leave a message.
They called me yesterday and I was finally able to submit a claim. Now whether or not they approve me is another story, but it's a relief to just not have to worry about trying to get in anymore.

Ironically, this is a lot how I pictured my retirement lol
I'm sorta re thinking that now...




rollntider




Rigg44

Crewe, hang in there. I know it is cliche to say but "This too Shall Pass". Or as little orphan Annie says " the sun will come up tomorrow" . And it will.   

TheNorm

Damn. Hang in there my friend.
"But it is not enough for me to stand before you tonight and condemn riots. It would be morally irresponsible for me to do that without, at the same time, condemning the contingent, intolerable conditions that exist in our society. These conditions are the things that cause individuals to feel that they have no other alternative than to engage in violent rebellions to get attention. And I must say tonight that a riot is the language of the unheard. And what is it America has failed to hear? It has failed to hear that the plight of the negro poor has worsened over the last twelve or fifteen years. It has failed to hear that the promises of freedom and justice have not been met. And it has failed to hear that large segments of white society are more concerned about tranquility and the status quo than about justice and humanity." - Martin Luther King, Jr

Crewe

I appreciate the thoughts guys and sorry, I didnt intend that to be a pity post, just sorta describing my day. I know everyone here could make a similar post, we just have to muddle through.

BojackHorsefella

Wanted to check in, although I'm probably the only one awake right now. Figured with quarantine and all, may be nice to wake up to something to reply to and replies to read to pass a few minutes.

Crewe

Things are about the same here. Im just not focusing on much down the road.
I did call my mortgage company though, they sent me notice saying we are here for you in this time of need and all that bullshit.
I had time so I figured what the hell, Ill look into this forbearance offer.
So, you apply and lets say you get a 3 month pass, no interest, no late fee, no reporting poor credit. Ok that sounds good.
After three months, you have to pay everything back in full.
Wait, what?
Or you could pay more each month, or you could take outa loan to pay everything back.
Hey motherfucker, if I had that kind of scratch, I wouldn't need the fucking forbearance in the first place!


Regarding work, jobs are starting to trickle in, and by that I mean three a month, but then they cancel, so I dont know what that means.
Honestly, Im at the point now where my options are
a) go out to work, get the virus and die.
b) stay home, lose my house, get kicked out in the street and die.

I know option a sucks, but b could be years of misery.
Thats why I try to focus on just today.

All in all, just chillin around the house with my dog and began a second play through on RDR2


Crewe

Had a job today, my first one in almost two months. I really did not want to go but I did even though its my only one of the week.
In the very few tis Ive been out, Ive found that people who wear masks take them off or lower them below the chin within a few minutes.
It's really sad to be around people who don't take this seriously. Only 80k dead out of 320 million? That's nothing!
Yea, you insensitive prick, unless you or yours are one of them. Not to mention its going to get much worse because there is no vaccine and can your pea brain understand what happens when there is no cure? Apparently not.

A buddy of mine goes out on walks at night and he lives in a real haughty part of town. He said he goes by a bar and its just packed with people and those who do have masks have them around their necks. Just blows my mind.

All that said, Im going to have to go back to work soon, assuming there is work and there's not much I can do.
Im almost to the point where I go out in public, get the virus and die.
Or stay home, run out of cash, get kicked out on the street and die.
Which of those sounds better?

And since this is a free flowing rant, today, a girl I respected turns out to be an anti vaxxer because you know, socialism. I swear that's what she said.
Something about the government injecting us to know more about us or some shit.
I liked it much better when people just shut the fuck up.